Messy, Murky, and Mental

We bought our current house a little over a year ago. I was working full time for the federal government and still completely remote but traveling a ton, so one of our first priorities was to set up my home office.

I don't know about you, but I'm a little particular with my arrangements, ironic for someone also known to reorganize her rooms every 4-5 months because they just "feel off". We shuffled things in, my giant standing desk, a cabinet, a book shelf and my dad's old army trunk that I turned into a small table. A few shelves on the wall to hold degrees and everything looked great.

I could see the door, see the window, I had a nice plain background for video calls and enough storage for the minimal personal paperwork I held onto. Then life happened, as it always does. We fostered more cats, so a cat tree came into the room. I found a need for a printer for the rescue I volunteered with so a printer desk was next. My chair hated the area rug and kept getting caught and as the 8 hr days tethered to my computer became 12 hr days, dishes and coffee mugs would pile up and the trash would overflow.

After I resigned my role in the federal space, I barely came into my office for a month. It gave me anxiety to feel like I was having to hurdle all of these remnants of the last year. I simply unplugged my personal laptop and worked from whatever space in the house felt right, but I knew, deep down, I'm just not a mobile person like that. I like my extra screens and having a defined space to work in - it just wasn't this space right now.

Last month I started asking AI how to rearrange my space. It never did give me an accurate mock up or floor plan, but it did suggest different things to consider, like what to remove from the room, how to condense vertically (filing cabinet) vs that paperwork spread that creeps along all open surfaces. I stopped worrying about if you could see one of the cats in the background or if the glare from the window would be poor lighting, that's what doors and curtains are for.

And yet, I was still in paralysis to actually make the change. I talked about it. A lot. So when Josh surprised me with a filing cabinet, I ripped the bandaid off and said ok, now is the time. A few days later I emptied the room, put back in only the things that felt right or were necessary. I brought in my artwork that I missed having around, pictures of Pittsburgh, my pets, and my favorite little creature works by Art of Seth.

The cat tree didn't come back in, but an extra chair did, allowing people to actually sit and work with me on things like the animal rescue non-profit but it also serves as the furkids nap spot. I can easily stand and stretch when needed now, there's nothing to trip over when I walk in, and that backlight isn't an issue once we fixed the blinds finally.

You're probably wondering why such a mundane story serves as the basis for this week's Messy Monday post, but it's because sometimes the messiest things we put off addressing are those that take up space around us in ways that are both obvious and hidden. I got a whole bag of trash from my office when I cleaned it - obvious mess. But I also decluttered my mental space - hidden mess. By opening it up, I made more space for things that matter. Josh could never manage in my office set up, too much screen glare, not enough access to the tech components that are pushed against the wall, etc. But that's why it's so important to navigate what works for us, within our constraints and also know what constraints are real - like the four walls of my office, and what are self-imposed, like being afraid the cats would be sad if I moved their cat tree.

As you head into this week, I challenge you to recognize some of your hidden messes that keep lingering because of your self-imposed constraints. Take the first step and start to challenge them a bit. Ask why you feel the way you do, who else might actually see what you think is hidden, is it even really a mess or just what works best for you... and if you need a push, click into that AI platform and ask it "how could I think about this differently?". You might be surprised what it comes back with.